im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
