it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
