i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
