why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize