i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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