I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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