Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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