I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
