Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
