My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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