brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Sober January is a disaster.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
