Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
