plz talk dirty to me
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I deserve this hangover.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
