I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
