Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
