ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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