dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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