where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
