Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
She bit a glass in half.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You are a genius and a whore.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
