Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize