Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I have aggressive nipples.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
