Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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