he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
