my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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