dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
