There is no way he is gay with that hair.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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