The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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