2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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