I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
