if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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