And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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