do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
How does it feel to date your dad?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
