i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
