I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
how drunk are you?
Several
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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