your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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