Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
