You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
