No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
