I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
