Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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