I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
