if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
