real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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