i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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