I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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