i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
