Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
