i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Randomize