Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
the day after is always just damage control
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
