The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize