Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
